Random hints for first time homeowners (like me)
Lawnmowers:
- When changing blades, be sure to:
- Turn off the valve in the fuel line between the gas tank and engine.
- Tip the lawnmower so the carburetor/air filter is facing up.
- If you do not do the above, the following will happen to your lawnmower:
- It will leak gas all over the place and leave a dead spot in your lawn.
- It will probably not start, regardless of how bad your hernia is from pulling the cord.
- If it does seem to start, it will likely belch sooty fumes and vibrate terribly before dying.
- It's air filter has become a Molotov cocktail waiting to be lit. You will need to replace what was a perfectly good air filter with one that is not saturated with gasoline.
- When re-attaching the sharpened blades:
- See the bullets above.
- Do not just hand-tighten the bolts that attach the blades to the mower.
Making fresh salsa:
- The ratio of tomatoes to onions is not 1 to 1 or even 2 to 1. Try at LEAST 4 to 1.
- Habanero peppers are perhaps the hottest substance known to man. Handle them only if you have sinus congestion or wish to cause serious leaking from your mucus membranes.
Gardening:
- One zucchini plant it plenty.
- One cilantro plant is plenty.
- Tomato cages are stupid.