Power Outage...

When I got home from the movie Friday night, my garage door wouldn't open. I nearly shook the opener into oblivion trying to get the last ounce of juice out of it before I noticed that the street light across the way was dim, and every single light in my house was out. Sometimes my powers of deduction amaze even myself.

This was the first power outage in my new home, and believe it or not, I was prepared! I knew where to find my headlamp, and I had some candles near the fireplace. I even cooked a late snack on the grill; yes, the same stainless steel, 80,000 BTU monstrosity that I just "had to have" when I moved into the new place.

Because it was already late evening when I arrived, the outage was hardly an inconvenience. I enjoyed the flickering candlelight and the sudden stillness of my little slice of suburbia. I went out to the backyard and looked up into the sky, where the stars were so readily visible that I was almost surprised. The surrounding communities all had their power, so the night sky to the north and south had the tell-tale yellow glow of civilization. It seemed decidedly out of place, particularly as I reached down to feel the twinkling dew that was starting to precipitate onto the backyard grass.

Eventually the moment wore off, and I decided to just go to bed, since there isn't much to do when the power's out. (As my roommate noted every time he flipped a light switch and nothing happened.) Lately I've had this sore muscle between my shoulders blades -- which started to ache with fatigue just as I laid down for bed. In response, I stumbled into the bathroom and located the tube of mentholated icy/hot cream which I'd come to love. I rubbed into onto the base of my neck, my nostrils filling with that familiar minty/old folks home scent. I laid myself back down and anxiously waited for the cooling sensation that I knew was coming.

But nothing ever happened... I had rubbed Colgate Extra Whitening on my back.